the dentist place

i went to the dentist.

i found this place in costa mesa, in an outdoor shopping mall. i think it's called "the balms". or is it the palms.

i was drawn to the place for apparent reason. the ad post said: "exchange special friendship." or something like that i didn't recall.

as soon as i walked in there i was led to a cell room. i walked out and about to see what was going on in the other rooms. some indian woman was helping another lady put jewelries all over her body. i walked to the next room, and one of the nurses at this dentist place started telling me about her life, how she ended up there and all. all the sudden i had an urge to cry but i managed to holding it in anyway--confused and not knowing what to do with my life.

i walked out of the dentist to shop around. and then i saw grandpa standing there waiting for me. he had 2 puddings in his hand, one was for him and one was for me. i managed to hold on to this moment a minute longer.. even though i felt it shifting away because i was almost waking. i wrote "i love grandpa" to him and told him so before the dream left me.


and there, that was that. i walked back to the dentist place, which was now structured behind a grand, locked golden door, resembling a chinese temple-style palace entrance. i couldn't enter in anymore for it was closed and locked..





0123 dejavu.. i was at pasadena with ying and the dentist was located in a shopping center that looks exactly like one mall hallway there.

long beach apartment by the pch

jacuzzi. daytime.

a friend, i didn't even know who, had companied me while at it. but she left later and left me alone all by myself.

a group of some extremely stupid, obnoxious teenagers were playing in the swimming pool. i was in the jacuzzi by myself in the very corner, struggling to move an inch of my body so i can get out of there. somehow every part of my body were numb. (i knew i wasn't stoned) then, too lazy to deal with it, i fell asleep.

i woke up and i was still in the jacuzzi. everybody else had left. i was all alone again. i went back to my dark and dull apartment. it's got a dim burnt yellow tone barely lightening the place up. there were nothing in there except a ghetto, postcard size tv and a mini refrigerator. the ceiling was right on top of my head.

i coudn't stand this shit anymore.

teeth crisis

my teeth were all loose.

i kept telling myself that i was dreaming, but i really wasn't.
i tried not to move my mouth to keep my teeth stable,
but eventually they all fell out and apart,
turned into powder, then into ashes.

1.714.xxx.3088

whoever this is, ended up hanging out with me. and we went to get food at some random drive-thru place.

murder

i was black.


and i accidentally shot another black guy on the neck. his blood dripped and dripped, slowly but surely until the brains flew out.

i cleaned up the mess, (how i did not know) hid the gun in my pants and ran away.

"altercation 60 percent"

first few chapters talk about how everyone faces flood disasters all over the world, people walk and hike all the time in weird landscape while encountering strange monster-looking animals--events just don't add up. and by the middle of the book it hits me.

legend has it that a scientist worked on a project, project of altercation 60 percent. every living species were turned into a size in relation among the others. the rule is: ants being the smallest and blue whale (largest animal in the world) being the biggest.

ants were enlarged, like zooming in in photo software, to the size of the blue whale. on the other hand blue whales became the size of the ants. every living species, based on the relative proportion alters its size accordingly.


i still couldn't figure out where the number 60 came from.